Going through a
divorce is difficult, especially for your kids. For them, a divorce can feel like
a devastating tragedy. They experience the loss of a parent, the loss
of the family unit, or the loss of the life they once knew.
Fortunately, you and the other parent can help your children cope and adjust
to the new circumstances in a number of ways. Not only can this make the
divorce process a little easier for your kids, they can even become mentally
and emotionally stronger once it is finalized.
The following are several ways to help your children cope with divorce:
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Encourage them to voice their opinions - The news of divorce can make them feel sad, angry, frustrated, and confused
about the entire ordeal. Encourage your children to share their feelings
and listen to them. Your kids need to understand that their feelings and
honesty are also valid and they what they say will be taken seriously.
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Help them put their feelings into words - If you notice a change in how your children normally act or any signs
of misbehavior, it is often an indication they are feeling angry or sad.
It is normal for children to experience difficulties in expressing how
they truly feel, so try to encourage them to verbally express their feelings.
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Validate their feelings - If you cannot turn their moods around or fix their problems, it is best
to simply acknowledge their feelings instead of dismissing them. Tell
your children you understand what they’re going through and let
them know it’s perfectly normal to feel sad or angry before you
start suggesting ways to make it all better.
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Give your kids ample advance notice prior to a parent moving out - Give your children the opportunity to visit the second home and know
where they will sleep when they visit. Perhaps they can help furnish the
place and bring over some possessions. Doing all of this can help them
transition into their new lives.
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Establish new rituals - This is especially true during the holidays and celebrations of special
events, such as birthdays, look for fun activities that are different
from the normal traditions you and your family shared. This can be a great
way to encourage building, or rebuilding, relationships.
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Be civil - It may seem like a monumental task to cooperate with your soon-to-be-ex-spouse,
but you need to successfully co-parent for the benefit of your children.
While your marriage together is coming to an end, you will always be parents
to your children, which means you will always have to maintain constant
communication with each other and cooperate. So avoid expressing bitterness
and resentment toward each other in front of the children. Showing that
you two are a united front will help your children effectively deal with
the divorce and the change in the family unit.
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Stay healthy - Divorce is extremely stressful, which is why it is important to manage
your own stress for you and your family’s sake. Keeping yourself
physically and emotionally healthy can help you better deal with stress
and help your kids effectively cope with their stress as well.
For more information about divorce in Texas,
contact our
Houston family law attorney at the
Law Office of Kathryn Marteeny today.